Saturday, October 24, 2026

Some bad jokes

Q: What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball?

A: Cough, gag, choke, etc.

Q: If your wife keeps coming out of the kitchen to nag at you, what have you done wrong?
A: Made her chain too long.

Q: A woman of 35 thinks of having children. What does a man of 35 think of?
A: Dating children.
 
Q: Why did God invent alcohol?
A: So fat women can get laid too.
 
Q: Why don't blind people skydive?
A: It scares the shit out of the dog.

Q: How do you get a nun pregnant?
A: You fuck her.

Q: What do you call a woman who has lost 97.5% of her intelligence?
A: Divorced.

He must be keeping it under 88...

Saturday, October 24, 2026

samovar \ SAM-uh-vahr, sam-uh-VAHR \ , noun; 
  • a metal urn, used especially by Russians for heating water for making tea. 
Origin: Samovar entered English in the 1800s from the Russian samovár , which means "self-boiler."

neverendum
  • The act of putting a referendum initiative on the ballot over and over, on the theory that voters will eventually support the proposition because they don't want to hear about it anymore.
"A referendum on banning ice cream again? This is the third time they've tried to get this passed in four years."
"I'm voting in favor this time, just to be done with this neverendum."
 
Short shorts: how short is too short? - Quora
booty hangers 
  • A pair of short shorts that when you wear them your 'booty' 'hangs' out of the bottom.
Girl 1: "Wow! Michelle's booty is coming out of the bottom of her shorts!" 
Girl 2: "Yeah, she always wears booty hangers."

 
History
  • Peace of Westphalia: marked the end of the Thirty Years' War, a series of European conflicts (1648)
  • Annie Edson Taylor: seeking fame and fortune, the former schoolteacher became the first person to survive a trip over Niagara Falls in a barrel; she used a pickle barrel (1901)
  • George Washington Bridge: upper level of the NY-NJ span opened; the lower level opened 31 years later (1931)
  • Fair Labor Standards Act: the 1938 act that established the 40-hour work week in the US went into effect (1940)
  • Toronto Blue Jays: became the first non-US team to win the World Series, downing the Atlanta Braves in 6 (1992)
Birthdays
  • Sarah J. Hale 1788 - She wrote the poem "Mary Had A Little Lamb."
  • Belva Lockwood 1830
  • James Sherman 1855
  • Molina Trujillo 1891
  • Preston Foster 1900
  • Moss Hart 1904
  • Sonny Terry 1911
  • Bob Kane 1915 (creator of Batman)
  • Y.A. Tittle (NFL) 1926
  • J.P. Richardson (The Big Bopper) 1930
  • Bill Wyman (Rolling Stones) 1936 
  • Santo Farina 1937
  • F. Murray Abraham 1939
  • J.P. Richardson 1930
  • David Nelson 1936
  • Jerry Edmonton (Steppenwolf) 1946
  • Kevin Kline 1947
  • Kweisi Mfume 1948
  • B.D. Wong 1962
  • Ben Gillies (Silverchair) 1979
  • Monica 1980
 
   
  
 
  

Friday, October 23, 2026

Rock out with the ANCIENT MARINER

This week we marked the birthday of Samuel Taylor Coleridge (1772-1834). How does he rock? you might ask. He was author of The Rime of the Ancient Mariner that was put to music scores of years after his death. And here it is:
 


Iron Maiden
The Rime of the Ancient Mariner
Hear the rime of the ancient mariner
See his eye as he stops one of three
Mesmerises one of the wedding guests
Stay here and listen to the nightmares of the sea.

And the music plays on, as the bride passes by
Caught by his spell and the mariner tells his tale.

Driven south to the land of the snow and ice
To a place where nobody's been
Through the snow fog flies on the albatross
Hailed in God's name, hoping good luck it brings.

And the ship sails on, back to the North
Through the fog and ice and the albatross follows on.

The mariner kills the bird of good omen
His shipmates cry against what he's done
But when the fog clears, they justify him
And make themselves a part of the crime.

Sailing on and on and north across the sea
Sailing on and on and north 'til all is calm.

The albatross begins with its vengeance
A terrible curse a thirst has begun
His shipmates blame bad luck on the mariner
About his neck, the dead bird is hung.

And the curse goes on and on AND ON at sea
And the thirst goes on and on for them and me.

"Day after day, day after day,
we stuck nor breath nor motion
as idle as a painted ship upon a painted ocean
Water, water everywhere and
all the boards did shrink
Water, water everywhere nor any drop to drink."

There calls the mariner
There comes a ship over the line
But how can she sail with no wind in her sails and no tide.

See...onward she comes
Onward she nears out of the sun
See, she has no crew
She has no life, wait but there's two.

Death and she Life in Death,
They throw their dice for the crew
She wins the mariner and he belongs to her now.
Then...crew one by one
they drop down dead, two hundred men
She...she, Life in Death.
She lets him live, her chosen one.

"One after one by the star dogged moon,
too quick for groan or sigh
each turned his face with a ghastly pang
and cursed me with his eye
four times fifty living men
(and I heard nor sigh nor groan)
with heavy thump, a lifeless lump,
they dropped down one by one."

The curse it lives on in their eyes
The mariner he wished he'd die
Along with the sea creatures
But they lived on, so did he.

And by the light of the moon
He prays for their beauty not doom
With heart he blesses them
God's creatures all of them too.

Then the spell starts to break
The albatross falls from his neck
Sinks down like lead into the sea
Then down in falls comes the rain.

Hear the groans of the long dead seamen
See them stir and they start to rise
Bodies lifted by good spirits
None of them speak and they're lifeless in their eyes

And revenge is still sought, penance starts again
Cast into a trance and the nightmare carries on.

Now the curse is finally lifted
And the mariner sights his home
spirits go from the long dead bodies
Form their own light and the mariner's left alone.

And then a boat came sailing towards him
It was a joy he could not believe
The pilot's boat, his son and the hermit,
Penance of life will fall onto him.

And the ship it sinks like lead into the sea
And the hermit shrieves the mariner of his sins.

The mariner's bound to tell of his story
To tell this tale wherever he goes
To teach God's word by his own example
That we must love all things that God made.

And the wedding guest's a sad and wiser man
And the tale goes on and on and on.