Movie Review: STAR WARS EPISODE III: Revenge of the Sith

I finally got to see it. On the fourth weekend since it's release I finally got to the theater to see the final installment of the Star Wars franchise. At this point it's grossed more than $500 million worldwide.

I don't know what people have been complaining about. The movie was about as perfect as a Star Wars movie can be.

AWESOME special effects.
AWESOME battles.

The conspiracies were well thought out. All loose ends were well tied together.

Watching the evil entwine and ensnare. Outstanding. The way Palpatine was orchestrating the entire takeover was brilliant. Luring Anakin... brilliant. Destroying the Jedi... brilliant. Creating the Empire... BRILLIANT!

FLAWS: Hmm. Well... none? I just loved it. Every minute of it. I've heard people complain about a lot of things about this movie, so I will offer my opinions on their criticisms:

• Padme's role was too minor.

How do you figure? The entire movie was ABOUT Padme if you think about it. Everything Anakin did was about Padme. He turned to the dark side to try to save her. It was really ALL about her.

• Mace Windu died like a bitch.

And what bitch was able to stand up to this Sith Master and drive Palpatine back? What bitch meets his end by having his hands cut off and being blown about one hundred miles away by Sith lightning? It was a more heroic ending to a Jedi Master's life than all the others who were shot in the back by the clone troops they were leading.

• Too many lightsaber battles.

Umm. I thought this was the rise of the Sith and the fall of the Jedi? How else will Jedi go down other than with a lightsaber in hand?

• Lightsaber battles too fast and muddled.

I have no idea what people are talking about on that one. The light saber battles were no faster than the ones of the previous two Star Wars movies. The only exception was General Grievous. But he was a cyborg. The whole mystique behind Grievous was that he was so fast and cunning that he was able to kill Jedi and was collecting the lightsabers as trophies. Even if you didn't read any of the books or saw the animations, it's easily implied that he's a badass by the number of sabers that he had collected in his cape alone, especially since he didn't have the gift of the Force on his side. And if people had a problem with Obi Wan being able to battle Grievous on his own, well, that's only establishes how skilled Obi Wan was.

• Dooku was defeated too easily.

Is that so? He put up a great fight, and Anakin used his anger and hate to defeat him. This only serves to reinforce that Anakin was already well along the path to the darkside without even knowing it.

• The technology was too inconsistent.

How can anyone say that? Foolish assertion. Why did Anakin have such a crude prosthetic when Luke's was so advanced? Why did some ships look so much more advanced than others that came later? To answer that question I look on OUR OWN planet. There are people with homes that look like they are from a flying saucer, and their are people living in mud huts. In different places, there's different technology. So asking why the Naboo had such "advanced" looking craft, while the rebels had such "crude" looking crafts is a ridiculous question.

And my friend Rob asked me to add the following on this subject:

Just because one machine looks more primitive than the other doesn't mean it is more primitive. That is just our perception. Remember the galactic civilization has had star flight for millennia. We can barely get beyond our moon and would be considered primitive by their standards. Just because Anakin went for a 'butch' prosthetic with exposed components doesn't mean it was less developed than Luke's hand. I think Anakin chose that design specifically because it was easier to maintain. [Editor's Note: I've heard somewhere that Anakin preferred that prosthetic so he could make his own adjustments. Star Wars fans should already know that he's good with machinery.]

As for the space craft, yes some 'look' more primitive. What exactly does this mean? More exposed components? A rougher look to them? We're talking about craft that are protected by forcefields and that have enough power to laugh at drag. Covering over a ship completely is probably optional. Remember the Y-wings? Their engine nacelles were originally covered but the Rebels later removed the hull plating from them because it was easier to repair them. The Y-wing was not more primitive than the X-wing though.

Some people care about aesthetics. Some don't. Especially in a war. You might also make a case that the more primitive ships were easier to produce and they were rushed into service.

• Darth Vader should never have yelled "No!" upon learning of Padme's death.

And why not? "It's not in his character." Padme was Anakin's wife! He joined the Sith to try to keep her alive. Unwittingly he destroyed all he knew and loved to achieve that, even killing Padme in a blinded rage. One of Anakin's characteristics was that he allowed his feelings to rule his life. He killed those Tusken's in a blind rage. He was willing to endanger his life to save clone troopers being picked off by the Droid Fighters. His loyalty to Palpatine made Anakin turn on the Jedi. Vader also made various grunts and yells in Episodes Five and Six.

• What's the story with Death Star being built at the end of EP 3?

Many people think it's unreasonable to think that if they were building the Death Star by the end of ROTS that the Empire would've definitely used it before EPISODE IV: A NEW HOPE. But it's not really established that the structure under construction is that same Death Star. In the books they established that there were THREE Death Stars: the two from the movies and a skeletal prototype version. The one showed at the end could've easily been that prototype, the one that the others were based on.

I just think that when this comes out on DVD there was be a lot of added scenes. I hear that a lot was chopped out to keep the time down. At more than two hours, it didn't feel long at all. And if they add all those little scenes that were in the book that didn't show up on screen, it'll be way cool.