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Provided by the compucert This is all 100% true. This is not a joke.
I remember it was a time after I started working at the accounting office. It had to have been between 1995 and 2001. I think it was about 2000 or so. Mark called my office, as he frequently did, and I welcomed the calls. I was happy to lend Mark an ear so he may vent, or divert his energies from mischief.
"I have to go out and buy condoms," he informs me.
I knew he was involved with an underaged girl at the time. She was one of those girls who wanted to "preserve her virginity" and would not have "sexual intercourse." However, that doesn't mean that all options were off the table. Mark wasn't exactly a gentleman and made it quite clear that he was wrangling her rump on a regular basis.
"You guys are worried about disease?" I asked.
"No, why?" he asked.
"Well, you guys only do the backdoor thing," I answered, "why do you need rubbers?"
"Hello? Pregnancy?" he responded.
"Are you serious?" I demanded.
"Yeah, man. I don't want to get her pregnant," he declared.
"And how would she get knocked up that way?"
"What do you mean?" he inquired.
"The womb's not up a woman's ass dude. No one can get pregnant that way," I stated bluntly.
"Really?" he asked in complete befuddlement.
"Yeah. Haven't you ever taken bio? Don't you know how the body works?" I responded. Then I briefly reviewed some human physiology with him and explained how the female body works. God knows I have no idea how the female mind works.
Finally, after the lesson he says, "Thanks man. I should have more talks like this with you. I didn't know."
And that was when I knew the human race was doomed.
I remember it was a time after I started working at the accounting office. It had to have been between 1995 and 2001. I think it was about 2000 or so. Mark called my office, as he frequently did, and I welcomed the calls. I was happy to lend Mark an ear so he may vent, or divert his energies from mischief.
"I have to go out and buy condoms," he informs me.
I knew he was involved with an underaged girl at the time. She was one of those girls who wanted to "preserve her virginity" and would not have "sexual intercourse." However, that doesn't mean that all options were off the table. Mark wasn't exactly a gentleman and made it quite clear that he was wrangling her rump on a regular basis.
"You guys are worried about disease?" I asked.
"No, why?" he asked.
"Well, you guys only do the backdoor thing," I answered, "why do you need rubbers?"
"Hello? Pregnancy?" he responded.
"Are you serious?" I demanded.
"Yeah, man. I don't want to get her pregnant," he declared.
"And how would she get knocked up that way?"
"What do you mean?" he inquired.
"The womb's not up a woman's ass dude. No one can get pregnant that way," I stated bluntly.
"Really?" he asked in complete befuddlement.
"Yeah. Haven't you ever taken bio? Don't you know how the body works?" I responded. Then I briefly reviewed some human physiology with him and explained how the female body works. God knows I have no idea how the female mind works.
Finally, after the lesson he says, "Thanks man. I should have more talks like this with you. I didn't know."
And that was when I knew the human race was doomed.
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