Best Emails: Feeling Stupid?

I'm pretty sure many of these aren't true at all. I'm fairly certain I've heard teh Mariah Carrey quote also being quoted from any number of super models...

> Brain Cramps
>
> If you are feeling dumb today, READ THIS...
>
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>
> Question: If you could live forever, would you and
> why?
>
> Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should
> not live forever, because if we were supposed to
> live forever, then we would live forever, but we
> cannot live forever, which is why I would not live
> forever,"
> -- Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss U.S.A. contest
>
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>
> "Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving
> kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I
> mean I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with
> all those flies and death and stuff."
> -- Mariah Carey, singer
>
> `````````````````````````````````````````
>
> "Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very
> important part of your life."
> -- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become
> Spokesperson for the Federal Anti-smoking Campaign
>
> `````````````````````````````````````````````````
>
> "I've never had major knee surgery on any other part
> of my body."
> -- Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky
> Basketball Forward
>
> `````````````````````````````````````````````
>
> "Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the
> lowest crime rates in the country."
> -- Marion Barry, Mayor of Washington , D.C.
>
> `````````````````````````````
>
> "I'm not going to have some reporters pawing through
> our papers. We are the President."
> -- Hillary Clinton, commenting on the release of
> subpoenaed documents
>
> ````````````````````````````````````````````````````
>
>
> "That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to
> death by a jackass, and I'm just the one to do it."
> -- A U.S. congressional candidate in Texas .
>
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>
> "Half this game is ninety percent mental."
> -- Danny Ozark, manager of Philadelphia Phillies
>
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>
> "It isn't pollution that's harming the environment.
> It's the impurities in our air and water that are
> doing it."
> -- Former U.S. Vice President Al Gore
>
> ```````````````````
>
> "We've got to pause and ask ourselves: How much
> clean air do we need?"
> -- Former president of American Motors, Lee Iacocca
>
> ```````````
>
> "The word "genius" isn't applicable in football. A
> genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."
> -- Joe Theisman, NFL football quarterback &sports
> analyst
>
> ````````````````````````````````````````````
>
> "We don't necessarily discriminate. We simply
> exclude certain types of people."
> -- Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC Instructor
>
> `````````````````````````````````
> "If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure."
> -- Former U.S. President Bill Clinton
>
> ``````````````````
>
> "We are ready for an unforeseen event that may or
> may not occur."
> -- Former U.S. Vice President Al Gore
>
> ``````````
>
> "Traditionally, most of Australia 's imports come
> from overseas."
> -- Keppel Enderbery
>
> ```````````````
>
> "Your food stamps will be stopped effective March
> 1992, because we received notice that you passed
> away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is
> a change in your circumstances."
> -- State Department of Social Services, Greenville ,
> South Carolina
>
> ````````````````````````````````````````````
>
> "If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this
> jack in at night as they go to bed and it will
> monitor their heart throughout the night. And the
> next morning, when they wake up dead, there'll be a
> record."
> -- Mark S. Fowler, former Federal Communications
> Commission Chairman
>
> ````````````````````````
>
> ...Feeling smarter yet? I THOUGHT SO!